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Is she my best friend?
Dear msX ~
I met my friend about a year ago. We immediately became
very close. She always tells me that she loves me. A few times she said we are best friends, but sometimes she
doesn't seem to think that is true. She is leaving for camp tomorrow, and I haven't seen her for over a week! I
tried to make plans with her, but it seemed like she didn't even care one way or the other. She said she would
call
me, but she never did. I sometimes fell that I try a lot harder to make our friendship work. For example, I once
made her a tape of songs and clips. She has never done anything like that for me. I am also almost always the one
who coordinates things we so together. I really need any advice!
Dear A,
Relationships aren't always fifty-fifty. Nor should you expect your friend to return love in the exact same manner
you offer it. People are different. Different needs, different abilities. When you put demands on a friendship,
you cause that person to evaluate if those demands are worth the return. Sometimes they're not. That's the risk
of putting demands on another. Lighten up and let this friend get off to camp without feeling badly about her friendships
at home.
ms. X
my mother
Dear msX ~
I need some advice, my mother has been unloading sh*t
on me since as long as I can remember it's like I'm a stranger to her that she thinks is just there to unload shit
onto. It's like I don't even know her anymore and I personally don't want to be around her ever again if she is
going to be like that. I can't even trust her with my money anymore after her biting my head off for no good reason
what so ever. Last night I called her up and mentioned that there was a 3-wheeled bike for sale in the newspaper
and asked her if I could get one because she is always nagging me to exercise more but she won't even give it a
chance. Please help my find a way to better live my life without having to put up with this crap. Thank you for
listening,
Dear Kate,
This is stuff you have to work out with your mother. Talk to her without anger. See if you can find a way to talk
to each other than doesn't result in one of you being hurt. I don't know what's going on between you, but whatever
it is can only be worked on with communication.
Good luck,
ms. X
what should I do
Dear msX ~
well I want to do something sweet and romantic for my
b/f but I dont know what to do and it is hard to think of something he would like me to do to him because it is
at a party he is having on the 4th of july and we will only have a little time together alone and not around any
one and I want it to be perfect and something he would enjoy so far no one has been able to help
(15,....been going out with boyfriend over 10 months)
Dear What Should I Do?
Whatever gesture of love you make, it'll be sure to be appreciated, as long as you keep anything that might be
embarrassing to him private. Maybe present him with a letter or music or something that says something about your
feelings for him. An IOU for a special favor to be collected at a later date. Use your imagination, girl.
ms. X
asking him out
Dear msX ~
Me and this guy have been talking for the longest time
now, and we've actually become really good friends. I totally dig this guy and unlike my past relationships, I
want to be able to just ask him out to his face and just be a real woman about it. But the thing is, is that I
don't really know how I can go about asking him out. Any ideas?
Dear Real Woman,
How about saying, Do you like Thai food (or Chinese or Greek)? Would you like to have dinner with me? Or get tickets
to something and ask if he'd like to go with you. Less threatening perhaps, ask him if he wants to go to the beach
with you. Guys do it all the time, they are relieved and flattered when they get asked. Just do it.
ms. X
I'm in love
Dear msX ~
I'm 17 years old and I'm in love. Lately, things have
not been going so well in our relationship. We've been through a lot and I just want to know what I can do to get
things going again. (Remember, we're 17 years old)
Dear 17 years old,
Sometimes taking a break from a relationship allows one to come back to it refreshed. Or not at all. A trial separation
may be in order. Think about what you both want and see if discussing it makes things better. Communication is
the first step to any solution you may find.
ms. X
2 Guys
Dear msX ~
I have been going out with a guy for over 10 months
and I love him, but their is another guy that I love. He is four years older than me and both of them love me too.
My boyfriend and I have been fighting over nothing the last couple of weeks. I love both of them and the other
guy and I know that our parents may not aprove but we would go out but act like were just really good friends.
What should I do?
Dear 2 Guys,
Do what you got to do. If you need to compare and contrast, go ahead.
ms. X
BAD PROBLEM
Dear msX ~
WELL I HAVE A PROBLEM I DON'T WANT NO ONE TO SEE THIS
BUT YOU I HAVE N'T HAD A PERIOD IN FOUR MONTHS I KNOW IT'S IRREGULAR BUT COULD THEIR BE SOMETHING ELSE WRONG OR
IS IT IN MY MIND
Dear Bad Problem,
Only a doctor can tell if something isn't right. Get over your fears and get yourself to a doctor. It's the only
way to be sure. It could be no big deal and you will have worried all this time for nothing.
ms. X
curious..........
Dear msX ~
this may sound strange, but im not sure if I have ever
had an orgasm during sex. is it possible not to feel it much or how is it supposed to feel?
Dear Curious,
You didn't say if you were a man or a woman. It does make a difference. But, I should hope you'd know if you had
one, male or female. Therefore, I presume you have not.
ms. X
I CHEATED WITH HIS BROTHER
Dear msX ~
I am 17 years old and I have a 20 year old boyfriend.
We have been together since I was 14. A few months ago I went over to his house but he was not there. His younger
brother was the only one home and he invited me in for a drink. We had been friends for a long time so I agreed.
I don't know how it happened, maybe we got to drunk, but we ended up sleeping together. After that I was avoiding
him and I couldn't even look my boyfriend in the eyes anymore. My boyfriend started to get really suspicious so
one day I just broke down and told him the whole story. He was sooooo angry it was unbelievable. What made it worst
is that he and his brother never get along. He left my house furious and the next day I heard he had beat up his
brother really bad. I felt like a big jerk and my boyfriend broke up with me. I knew I deserved it but it still
hurt. Well a few weeks after that we started talking and we both agreed we still loved each other. We started taking
it really, really slow and eventually he forgave me. A few days after we were back together his brother came over
to my house and said he was in love with me and he wanted me to leave his brother for him. he told me he had planned
that night to get me in bed because he always loved me and he had slipped something into my drink. This was too
much. I practically threw him out of my house but now he won't stop bothering me. He calls and leaves messages
on my machine, every time I'm over there he makes comments when my boyfriend isn't looking. It is really starting
to get out of hand but he would not stop. A few days ago he said he would kill himself if I don't leave my boyfriend
for him. He is psycho. Should I tell my boyfriend what is going on so his brother can get another bruising? What
should I do? I made a stupid mistake and now I want to get on with my life with my boyfriend he is messing everything
up. Please help me. I don't know what to do!
Dear I Cheated With His Brother,
While you may have shown a lack of judgment in putting yourself into a questionable situation with your boyfriend's
brother, what he did (spike your drink in order to have sex with you) was both illegal and immoral. The guy needs
help, but no one says you have to be the one to give it to him. Tell his parents, if you're comfortable with that,
or his brother and suggest that he get help or you will press charges. If necessary, an order of protection might
be a good idea.
Good luck,
ms. X
Scared
Dear msX ~
I know you are real busy but I need some advice.
Okay...I recently turned 17 and found out I am pregnant 4 months ago. Although I am now happy to be having a baby,
I am scared and I feel alone. My mom does not live with me, and I really miss her. I feel like I really need her
now and she's so far away. But I can't really blame her because I was the one who ran away. Now she's forgiven
me, but she makes me feel like she wants to get me out of the way. Like se doesn't want to help me. I 'm really
scared because I don’t know what to expect and how the heck I 'm going to take care of a child if I can hardly
take care of myself. But I feel like I will do anything to raise my child. Sometimes I just want to die, and I
regret waking up in the morning,. The only thing that keeps me going is the fact that I am having a baby.
Dear Scared,
You need to tell your mother these feelings. Tell her you need her. She might have lots of issues to get over,
but I believe she will still be there for you. Go home and talk to your mother, from the heart. Let her vent her
negativity and pretty soon she may come around. Grandchildren have a way of softening even the hardest of hearts.
Good luck,
ms. X
lately it seems like more
Dear msX ~
Ok, I really really really like this guy I have known
since I was four. We have always been friends but lately it seems like more. He flirts with me alot, like picking
me up and tickling me and stuff like that. Well, now that I realize that I like him a lot, he is moving. It's only
an hour away, but still. I'm really going to miss him and am wondering if I should tell him. Please help! I have
no clue what to do! On one hand, he could like me too but then we'd never see each other, on the other hand, the
thought of liking me could gross him out. He could tell his mom (who is best friends with my mom) and I would be
soooo embarrassed. Anyway, please help.
Dear Likes a Neighbor,
If your moms are best friend, then obviously you will be seeing each other in the future. Hold off on your declarations
of love until you see each other after the move. A geographically undesirable romance is not easy to maintain.
Think about if you really want to tie yourself to someone you see only occasionally.
Good luck,
ms. X
DON'T WANT TO LET GO
Dear msX ~
I REALLY NEED YOU'RE HELP. OK WHEN I FIRST MOVED TO
F.L ME AND JOSH WERE GOOD FRIENDS. THEN WE WENT INTO LIKING EACH OTHER. WE STARTED TALKING BUT HIS EX. MESSED IT
ALL UP. I STILL REALLY CARED ABOUT HIM. SO WE STARTED TALKIN AGIAN, AND HAVIND SEX, BUT IT GOT NO WHERE. SO I WROTE
HIM A LETTER TO SAY MAYBE IT WAS BEST WE JUST BE FRIENDS. I DID NOT WANT THAY BUT I DO NOT WANT TO MAKE IT SEEM
LIKE I WAS PUSHING HIM. I DO NOT KNOW WHAT TO DO I REALLY CARE ABOUT HIM MAYBE EVEN IN OVE WITH HIM, AND I WANT
HIM AS A BOYFRIEBD WHAT DO I DO?
Dear Don't Want to Let Go,
Sounds like he's already let go, sweetie, and all you're holding onto is air. Back up, go the friends route, if
possible, and see where it leads. It's frustrating, but you really can't always get what you want.
ms. X
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